The Bird rarely spits up. In his four and a half months, he’s spit up only around 10 times. Maybe 15. At least half of these occurrences have taken place minutes after someone asked us, “Does he spit up much?” and we have answered, “Hardly ever.”
I’m fairly confident he doesn’t speak
English yet … but these events make me wonder. They also concern me. If this is the Bird expressing his independence to prove us wrong, we’re in trouble later.
“Does he make good grades?” a coworker might ask one of us.
“Straight As,” we’ll answer just before he comes home with a failing report card.
“Is he well behaved?” someone will ask.
“He’s a very good boy,” we’ll reply even as he’s being given a suspension notice at that very instant.
“Is he good with the dog,” an animal-loving friend will inquire.
“Oh yes,” we’ll say as Casey comes into the room with a large chunk of missing fur.
Or maybe he just had to spit up.